Make Your Own Effigy

Hello, folks! It's Larkin here, and I want to warn  tell you about this new recipe I just thought up! So here goes...

Make Your Own Poop Monster Effigy

1. Harvest a bowl, a microwave, a banana, a small Snickers bar, some mayonnaise, pepper, chocolate (in powder, syrup, or bar form), and (optional) a chunky sauce from your cabinets.

2. On the counter, organize ingredient containers into the shape of your favorite president's face. No cheating.

3. In the bowl, mush up some banana. Not too much! Then, add all ingredients except microwave to the banana mixture. You can decide the amounts of the ingredients depending on how you want His Effigy to look. No need to mix yet.

4. Plug in the microwave and put the bowl with ingredients in for 30-45 seconds. Hold your nose and take it out.

5. Mix the hot ingredients. Immediately excuse yourself to the bathroom and dump the contents of the bowl into the toilet. Wipe up the excess from the bowl with TP and throw that into the toilet, too.

TA-DA!! Your every own Poop Monster Effigy in just 5 easy steps. Surprise your family, friends, and even your favorite president with this recipe. They won't laugh, because it. Was no. Joke.

-L